It’s all done. Everyone knows. Almost.
I can’t help but run “Slipping through my fingers” in my mind over and over and over again. And everytime I do, it feels sad.
Yes I’m definitely looking forward to Part 2. I know that’s another phase. One that’s going to be electrifying and happening especially with someone I compare to a spinning top. Yes. It will be alright.
It’s this part of my life that I’m definitely going to miss. My cozy little room. Being pampered by people I adore and just lazing around on my lappy not having to worry about the future. And suddenly that seems to be the center of my attention.
My future. A big question mark. In bold. In black. Scaringly big. Almost like its booing me and questioning my innocence/ignorance of not having thought about it so far.
All of a sudden, it seems there is a whole new responsibility. People say “you don’t have to change. just be yourself.” And all they want me to do is to just change. I am asked to be a big girl. Be more responsible. Learn to be independent. Start helping your mom in the kitchen. You will change. Blah. Blah. Blah. and Blah.
Just when things finally seemed to be happening for me, I feel like I’m a plant being uprooted ruthlessly and “put” in my place. Is this a beginning or the part where I lose a part of me? I have no answers. I keep searching and all I can feel is darkness and me groping around hoping to find the light at the end of the tunnel.
Pray for me.